"You wouldn't get it. The game is rather complex and you're not smart enough to understand its mechanics." Saffronkit mews, matter of factly. Brownkit cuffs his brother on the ear. "Don't say that to her. We'll play something else." Monarchkit shakes her head, "It's okay! I don't mind! We can play a different game tomorrow!" She skips away before either of her brothers could say anything else. Saffronkit says a lot of things he doesn't mean. He doesn't know it's hurtful that he basically called her dumb to her face. Monarchkit doesn't get offended. Monarchkit is too dumb to understand that she should be offended. She wanted to cry. She wanted to tell them that she's a good learner, that she can learn the game and play it. But instead she's happy to play hide and seek on her own. She's happy. She's happy. SHE'S HAPPY. "There you are." Monarchkit flumps backwards to find herself nose to nose with her grandmother. "Grandma!" "Why were you crying?" Laurelwing asks. "I'm not! I'm playing hide and seek!" Monarchkit meows. "By yourself?" "You found me! So I'm playing with you!" Laurelwing's long white tail curls around Monarchkit. "Why are you upset?" "I'm not!" "My grandmother senses were tingling. Don't lie." Monarchkit didn't really want anyone to be worried about her. But if the grandmother senses detected something... "Saffronkit said... I can't play his game cause I won't understand it. But I saw them play a round and I do understand it." "He made you feel dumber than you actually are?" "Kinda... BUT I don't want to tell him that! I don't want him to feel bad! So its okay! I'm okay with it. It's okay for me to be dumber than Saffronkit and Brownkit. I don't have to play their games. I can play my own." "I know a few games," Laurelwing winks. Laurelwing died. It wasn't sudden but it felt like that to Monarchpaw. Laurelwing hadn't told anybody until she couldn't hide it any longer. Monarchpaw was too dumb to see that her grandmother was dying right before her eyes and just ignorantly played and played and played until Laurelwing didn't wake up. She felt hollow. She wanted to scream, to sob, to yell for her grandmother to come back. but instead she just smiled. Brownpaw was the one screaming and crying and whimpering for Laurelwing to come back, and Monarchpaw patted him on the back and said that it's okay because grandma was now happy in Starclan watching over them. Why was Brownpaw this upset? He wasn't the one who spent ever waking moment with Laurelwing. He wasn't the one who spent so many nights learning all the different games Laurelwing knew. Being taught how to tell if a cat is lying, the fastest way to incapacitate an enemy cat, or how to make an executable plan on the spot. He wasn't the one who Laurelwing trusted enough to share her darkest secret with. Her ignorant little brother. He doesn't know. that. grandma. is. not. in. starclan. Saffronpaw says nothing. He does not cry. He does not care. He just watches as they cover Monarchpaw's beloved grandmother with dirt.
Marshfeather drags himself from his nest. He carefully steadies himself as five tiny and very fluffy bundles slide out of his long well-kempt fur. He wasn't certain which of the kits they were. Shadowclan had at least 30 kits the last time he counted. But as a permanent den dad, it was his duty to care for all of them as if they were his own kit. KITS. Kits. He corrected himself. Marshfeather was always a late sleeper, so by the time he exited the nursery most of Shadowclan was already up and about. A couple kits scamper around him, playfully batting at his tail. He pauses a moment to flick his tail wildly like a mouse on the run and winces when one of the kits bits too hard. Being a den dad was nice. Certainly the most relaxed of all the jobs he could of chosen. Marshfeather had only been living in shadowclan for a few months. Since the winter passed and Plumflower had saved his life after he suffered a fatal injury. Shadowclan was very welcoming and he had already made quite a few friends, but he felt empty still. Two cats were missing from his life, but he knew. He'd just have to stay here. Stay in the place where he lost them. So maybe one day. They will come back and find him waiting. Waiting. and Waiting. He wished he didn't change his name.
