I swear. My motivation has been getting worse and worse. I'll go like, sometimes over a month without having the motivation to do literally anything, and then I have a short burst where I'm able to complete several tasks easily, and then it just disappears again. And it feels like the periods where there's no motivation are getting longer, and the short bursts are getting shorter. And the worst part is the short bursts never happen when I actually NEED them to. Got a school assignment that's over 3 months overdue? Nah, still not gonna let you do it. Have this project you need to finish for a contest before a deadline? Nah. Oh, you want to do this thing that's a complete waste of time that you later end up hating? SURE!!! GO DO THAT!! Oh, there's something you really want to work on? Hmmm... How about no. LIKE, GOD, JUST, STOP. JUST STOP. PLEAASE. WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO MEEE!??!?! I have over 100 projects that are unshared that I haven't even STARTED working on. (They're spread across my multiple accounts, of course, but there's still well over 100 in total.) And over half of those I probably will never start working on at all. JUST... JUST WHYYY???? WHY MOTIVATION NO WORK LIKE HOW SUPPOSED TO WORK??? WHY KEEP RUNNING??? WHYWHYWHYWHYWHWHWHW so uh yeah don't be surprised if I just stop posting for a while and then come back with like four projects and then die again. because that will happen. And there's nothing I can do to stop it. Uhhh anyway bye just wanted to rant about that lol-
