Clay. Don't give a care about what others think. Some truly just want to see the world burn. Don't fuel there flame. Try and stop it. About one year ago, i was in a similar situation to how you are now. Don't ask me for advice, I, at that time, made all the wrong choices. (I'll tell you about it some other time, but the knife may be a hint) I let the world burn; and it engulfed me in its flames. And the burn marks don't go away easy, that's one thing i can say. Your heart breaking pains those around you, the ones that truly care. Stop the burning. Do what I never did. Wake up. Are you doing ok? Don't fear talking. Sorry if this makes very little sense, i often speak in metaphors