venting here because i feel like crap for dumping this on my friends (perfect tie-in) once, i vented all the time. i cried, all the time. but now i feel like i can't do that anymore. i don't go to public school. i homeschool. but, im going back next semester. why do i dread this? i genuinely hate it there. i cant focus at home, i cant focus at school. it feel like everyone there hates me. im the weird furry. i am a curse to my few friends. my friend group, at least through how i see it, is breaking up. EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS IS GOING TO THE OTHER HIGHSCHOOL. my best friend since 6th grade is even leaving me. but she said she would stay with me. she is going /there/ because a few more friends of her's go. i have a friend going to my highschool, but really, they aren't THAT close, and probably wont go anyway. there's one other friend, but they are a grade lower, i'd never see them. nonetheless, highschool wont be a "new start", everyone knows im the 'weird furry girl' and they refuse to forget it. i feel so inscure about every little thing. i bet you none of my friends know my favorite music artist (at the moment). its most likely because i am so scared of being judged that i wont tell anyone anything. i hate goldfish (how to get canceled on the blue bird app haha) (serious tho those are nasty) but im sometimes even scared to tell people that. there's this really cool girl at my homeschool science class thing, and she's also an artist, likes wings of fire, bluey, nature n taxidermy/bones/hunting, and has a cool asesthic. i can talk to them, but i literally withhold everything <33 /neg (i noticed, /gen is /neg backwards) idk my life is on fire atm tl;dr : i feel bad abt existing, having an existentical crisis <33 also life update moment i think Wicca is hella cool
