HIHI SIDENOTE B U T I may or may not switch over to Medibang for drawing shhh. But have some art of our favorite galaxy kitty <33 (drawn in Firealpaca btw!) --------- Anyway, I'll just head straight to the point of this whole project. To be honest, I haven't been feeling great mentally at all. It feels like I have something that's weighing me down severely. I'm showing multiple signs of depress!on and anxiety and they won't go away. It's lingering around me no matter what I try. I can't seem to enjoy myself anymore. I keep trying but I can't find joy in things I usually love doing. I feel so drained out and lacking energy more than usual. There's voices inside my head that keep telling me the same thing over and over again. "You're worthless." "Stop being lazy." "Try harder." "Stop crying." Tbh all I really ever thought of myself was a mistake. Like I'm not even supposed to be here. What /am/ I doing here? I mess things up so much. My parents keep telling me to help around the house. If I don't, they yell at me. If I do, they still yell at me. They expect too much from me. What's the point? I'm never going to be good enough. They call me impolite and an ungrateful brat. My dad more specifically. My mom on the other hand keeps bringing up how I'm behind on my studies. Like? I GET it. But it doesn't help with her continuous scolding about it. It just makes me feel worse and even more stressed. I'm so genuinely stressed out about all the art I have to do. I feel so guilty about leaving people I owe hanging. I have no idea if anyone has noticed, but my comments are off a lot more recently. I just can't cope with things right now and spam is genuinely stressing me even more. Whether it's a joke or not. And for those of you who are suggesting for me to take a break from scratch, it really isn't that simple. I know you care, but I have many things due and I can't just up and leave. Btw to that one friend who actually cares so much as to threaten me to do stuff about my mental health lmao, you know who you are (assuming you're reading this pft-). Thank you. <333 Though I have no idea what to do anymore. I guess I'll just force myself to work on things like I normally do lmao. Though please don't worry about me. Love you guys so please stay safe and have a great day/night. <333
