ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ʟᴏᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: ᴋʀᴇᴠɪᴄ ᴅᴇɴ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ: ᴘʀɪᴍʀᴏꜱᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ: ᴅᴜꜱᴋ Primrose had requested for Ahanu to leave her be, as she trudged, limping into the den. An aching heartache of realization finally hit her. She neglected it for far too long. She had felt it coming, ever since those dreary moons ago once she padded into the Reign. But no amount of grieving was able to determine how hurtful this was. This unrequited pain. She was losing it all. A loner was killing for sheer sport, just for the fun of it. That Hayshian, Kendric even affirmed it for her. A dead elk carcass, plucked and dug into by other beastly creatures. But not by a wolf. That seemed to be the very least of her problems, though. Primrose sat down, staring ahead, yet digging further into her mind, focused purely on her lonesome thoughts. Lonesome. That was the word. That was the word she hated most. Primrose had never been the 'jealous' type, had she? No. Not particularly. Yet, why did she find herself inquiring about this if she was so sure? The truth was, she wasn't. She didn't know. She didn't know whether she was lonesome and jealous. Jealous of what, she asked herself? Jealous of her packmates. They clearly had love. She knew that it was clearly obvious some of them were obviously affiliated with some star-struck significant others. She didn't know exactly which of them this applied to, but she had the gut-wrenching feeling this was so. But that wasn't what Primrose wanted. It wasn't what she asked for, once her mother died of that horrible disease. She had asked for a pack, and to belong somewhere. And that's what Primrose had gotten. She hung her head now, feeling this contemplation drain her somewhat acceptable, fake and shallow happiness. She wanted more. She yearned for more. She felt so... alone. There was nobody there for her. She didn't have a friend. She didn't have a love interest, or a mate. She had no one. She was lonesome. Tears pricked her eyes, but her ears remained erect and forward. She had no heirs. She had no individual to care for her when she grew old. She had no little one to care for. She'd been depriving herself of what could be, being so introverted and neglectant to open up. And now, she'd pay the price. But she didn't want to. But oh, how could Primrose escape the lonesome reality? She didn't know how to be social and interact with others. She herself didn't completely trust her packmates, or anyone, for that matter. What if they stabbed her in the back? Betrayed her, for some barbaric and cruel reason? Primrose was too afraid to risk it. But, it was worth risking it if she'd find love. But she held too much fear. Too much cowardice to try so. She started lightly sobbing, as tears finally flooded her eyes. How was she even an Alpha, really? How did her packmates see her? Weak, as she really was, or some kind of grand philanthropist? If they thought of her as great, they were clearly wrong. And she was lying to them, for them to think this. Of course she was lying to them. This sobbing fit she was having? She hid it from everyone. She sheltered her emotions, storing them up just to let it all out, in secret. In discreet, hoping no one would notice. Primrose was lonely and jealous, and she knew it. But, she shouldn't be. She shouldn't be crying over something so stupid. She didn't need love. She didn't need company. She was an independent wolf. After all, she had gotten everything she wanted.... Right?
A self-roleplay with Primrose who pretty much admits to herself her feelings and letting that negative energy lose. But in the end, she denies it all. We all know she's pretty lonely, right? I truly hope this hurt your feels, that means I'm getting good at emotions >:) Bone Count: Complex bg - 5 bones Headshot - 2 bones Literature - 2 bones Total: 9 bones. Art: @BlueTimberWW84 Character: Primrose - @BlueTimberWW84 Coding: @colorsnatch Music: Everything I Wanted - Billie Eilish
