Artemis: Good morning. Butler: Good morning. Holly: Good morning. Foaly: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Mulch: MORNING MOTHERF(lAngUAgE)S ——— Butler: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me? Artemis: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it. Butler: Three of us saw it, Arty. How do you explain that? Artemis: *points at Holly* Sleep deprivation. *points at Foaly* Paranoia. *points at Mulch* Delusional personality disorder. ——— Artemis: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends. Butler: ... Your what? Artemis: My friends. Holly: Is he saying “friends”? Foaly: I think he’s being sarcastic. Mulch: No, no, no, this is delirium, he’s cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Artemis! All of your friends are in this room. Artemis: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks. ——— Foaly: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one! Mulch: Tubular AF! Holly: Mood to the max! Artemis, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it. Butler, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square. ——— Artemis: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Butler: Several traffic violations. Holly: Three counts of resisting arrest. Foaly: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Mulch: Also, that’s not our car. ——— Artemis: Bye Butler! Bye Holly! Bye Foaly! Bye Mulch! Bye Butler! Holly: You said ‘bye Butler’ twice. Artemis: I like Butler. ——— Artemis: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life Butler: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years! Holly: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this! Foaly: I knew I lost that potential somewhere! Mulch: My moral code, is that you? Artemis: Artemis: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?
