Transcript: (UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING) We need to loosen those ancient joints. First the wheels. And forward, and rest, and forward, and rest. Join me! Rest. (HUFFING) And rest. Is all this restin' necessary? We're workin' ya in slowly. And reach for your lunch. Reach for you lunch. Now reach, to the front. What is there? It's your lunch. Now backwards. is lunch there? McQUEEN: When do we go on the simulator? CRUZ: Good morning, Mr. McQueen. Lookin' good. (YELPS AND GRUNTS) Why? Me: LoL This'll get oil to places is hasn't been in a long time. -Is that a drip pan? -Just in case. How old do you think I am? Talking Ben: You are 40 years old Visualize yourself driving fast down a steep hill. I'll be back in a few. Visualize... Wait. Cruz! A few what? I just wanna go on the simulator. KURT: How's it hangin', Drip Pan? (ENGINES ROARING) -'Sup? -Okay, day three... Treadmill. I've set a maximum speed to conserve your energy. What I want you to do is visualize beatin' on this guy. (McQUEEN GRUNTS) -Storm! -Uh-huh, that's right. Get him! Get him, Mr. McQueen! Sonic: Yeah, Bet Him McQueen! Get him? This thing's only going like 5 miles an hour! Me: Just Go Faster We'll work to the higher speeds right after you take your nap. -Nap? I don't need a nap! -(RACERS LAUGHING) KURT: Hit him with the bugs! (LAUGHS) I am not taking a nap! ANNOUNCER: All cars in the test bay simulator-- (YAWNING) How was your nap, Mr. McQueen? It was kinda refreshing actually. Oh! Okay, what are you-- Hey! Elizabeth: Calm Down You've been driving on tires a long time. Have you ever stopped too get to kown 'em? I'm sorry, what? Tires are individuals. You should give each a name. Name them? (SCOFFS) I won't be doin' that. Mine and named Maria, Juanita, Ronaldo, and Debbie Richardson. -What? -Long story. May I have tires back so I can go on the simulator please? Name them! Uh, Lefty, Righty, Backy, Backy Junior. Okay? -Does this make you mad? -Yes, it does! Use that! And merge, and yield, SMG4: Oh Come On -and merge, and yield. -(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) Me: FacePalms Beep, beep, beep, beep. Now you got some tire damage. Speed bump, speed bump. Now clean up your messy garage. -Bug in your windshield. -Thank you, Cruz, I'm done. Talking Tom: Hey, Where are you going Mr. McQueen, where are you going? McQUEEN: To the future. Okay. Here we go. How do I do this? -Come on, baby. -Mr. McQueen-- Cruz, thank you for the old-man training, as crazy as it was, but I'm... warmed up enough and now I need you to launch this thing. Me: Your Not Ready Wait until you can handle it. Please? -There are no shortcuts. -(CLICKING) Okay. We'll just see about that. STERLING: All right. My star racer is on the simulator! Why, yes, I am! Well, let's see ya take it out for a spin. Right away, Mr. Sterling, owner of the company. Okay. Have fun. Elizabeth: Yeah, Have Fun (CLICKS SWITCH) Sonic: Oh Boy This is what I'm talkin' about! Whoa. Didn't know about those. (GASPS) SIMULATOR: Prepare to race. The green flag is out. I don't see the flag. What do I do? -Go. -Go? Me: Just Go (REVVING) Whoa. That's sensitive. (YELPING) SIMULATOR: You have hit a wall. -It shouldn't be this hard, should it? Ah! -You have hit a wall. You're fighting the simulator. Just race like you always do. -You have hit a wall. -Whoa. There can't be this many walls on a regular track. SMG4: Just try Our Best You have a passed by Jackson Storm -Wait, Storm's in here? -For motivation. Storm races at 207. Pick it up, Mr. McQueen! I'm tryin'! (GRUNTING) Me: Stay Calm -Ahhh! -You have hit a wall. Mr. McQueen, come down from there and we'll work you up to this. I am fine, Cruz. I can do it, okay? Talking Ben: Watch Out! -Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! -(TIRES SCREECHING) -(CRASHING) -Ahh! -You have jumped a barrier. -Oh! (BABBLING) (GASPS) Sorry! You have maimed two vehicles. You have destroyed a drinking fountain. (SCREAMING) You have disabled an ambulance. You are on fire. Danger. Danger. You are going the wrong way. Look out! Look out! Turn it off! Turn it off! Get these things off of me! -(SCREAMING) -(CRASHING) Me: Oh God! SIMULATOR: You have crashed. You have crashed. -Are ya all right? Elizabeth: Are You Okay? -You have crashed. I have crashed. (ELECTRICITY BUZZING) (POWER SHUTS DOWN) Sonic: That's Not Good
I DON'T OWN ANYTHING!!!!!!!!
