I need to vent before I explode. This is the worst. It sucks. I suck. I'm such an ugly rat and people just keep me around because of they pity me. I'm not accepted and its mentally tearing me apart. People don't call me by my pronouns, and don't talk to me straight to my face either. My best friend isn't here. She probably keeps me around because she feels sorry for me LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS WORLD I HATE THIS FEELING I WISH I WAS HANDSOME I WISH SOMEONE LOVED ME I WISH HE LIKED ME BACK I WISH I WAS NORMAL I WISH PEOPLE WOULD STOP COMPLIMENTING ME I WISH I COULD JUST THROW MYSELF OFF A CLIFF AND NEVER HAVE TO FACE THIS HORRIBLE FEELING AGAIN IT TEARS ME APART AND HURTS MY HEART I SHAKE AT NIGHT CRYING BECAUSE ITS HARD, OK?!? AND NO, THIS ISN'T TO GET ATTENTION. THIS ISN'T FOR FAME OR PITY. I DON'T WANT PITY. I WANT TO BE DIFFERENT. AND I HATE MYSELF. YOU CAN'T FIX THAT, OK?! this isn't for fame. or popularity. its not a phase. so don't even try that. i just want to sit in the corner and die. no one would miss me. no matter what you say, i'm ugly and horrible and annoying to have around. i dont want to take a break from scratch. i have friends here and i can express myself through my work.. i want to escape from the real world. if you're going to talk to me about this, don't. its a sensitive subject... why can't i just die... everyone ships someone. but no one loves me. no one even tolerates me. i'm seen as quiet and weird at school. you don't know how badly i mentally suffer from this. i'm shaking really hard and crying just typing this. but... i <3 you guys. thank you for years of fun and games. it was nice knowing you guys as long as i did. does this sound like goodbye? maybe it is... i don't know anymore.
STOP WITH THE OVVERLY NICE COMMENTS IT CAUSES ME ANXIETY PLEASE STOP! please stop with the crazy compliments. something like "cool!" or "nice!" is fine, but "AAHHHA SO COOL" or "woooow the coding and art is so good :'0 i wish i could do things like that" OR "weooow teach me your ways" OR EVEN "U R SO UNDERATED AAAH"or anything REMOTLEY close to that is SUPER stressful to me. it makes me feel like i'm showing off, and i hate it. if you want ME to do something differently, just tell me. And i'm NOT A GIRL I'M GOING TO SAY THIS NOW SO STOP WITH THE SHE/HER CRAP ITS RUDE AND I HATE WHEN PEOPLE MISGENDER ME it would be amazing if people on scratch would! it would make my life EASIER i KNOW i can't make irl people do it. and i KNOW they won't just because the can. but if i have even a FEW good friends use my pronouns, you guys would make my life SO much easier. is it really that hard to drop the s?
