Set fire to your hair Poke a stick at a grizzly bear Eat medicine that's out of date Use your private parts as Piranha bait Dumb ways to die So many dumb ways to die Dumb ways to die-ie-ie So many dumb ways to die Get your toast out with a fork Do your own electrical work Teach your self how to fly Eat a two-week-old unrefrigerated pie Dumb ways to die So many dumb ways to die Dumb ways to die-ie-ie So many dumb ways to die Invite a psycho-killer inside Scratch a drug dealer's brand new ride Take your helmet off in outer space Use a clothes dryer as a hiding place Dumb ways to die So many dumb ways to die Dumb ways to die-ie-ie So many dumb ways to die Keep a rattlesnake as a pet Sell both your kidneys on the internet Eat a tube of super glue I wonder, what's this red button do? Dumb ways to die So many dumb ways to die Dumb ways to die-ie-ie So many dumb ways to die Dress up like a moose during hunting season Disturb a nest of wasps for no good reason Stand on the edge of a train station platform Drive around the boom gates at a level crossing Run across the tracks between the platforms They may not rhyme, but they're quite possibly Dumbest ways to die The dumbest ways to die Dumbest ways to die-ie-ie So many dumb So many dumb ways to die
