Honeysong sat in the old den. It stunk of badger and blood, the once shiny pebbles that had interested her as a kit were now dark, lifeless, and cruel cutting into her skin. Tears rolled down her cheeks slowly, threatening to fall to the ground. As if it was scared to fall. To fall to there in preventable death of the pebbles. Finally one by one they fell hitting to ground with a splat soaking up the red from the blood surrounding her paws. Honeysong toke a deep breath as her stomach growled. She hadn’t eaten in days and even if she wanted to eat a good wren, she would have to ask for help since she could barley hunt. She slashed a deep cut into her wrist. The past moon resurfaced in her mind. The attack, the dream, everything. The tears started to come quickly once more collecting at her chin begging for not another tear which would make them heavy enough to fall. But Honeysong didn’t care, why should she when no one cared about her. All her life it was just fake love. Her adoptive mother barley was there to comfort her, and when she needed her most she toke the side that were opposing her. Her real mother was probably living the life, and her fathers life probably became extremely happy once he abandoned her to die. Clearpaw had never even wanted her around, to in love with Scout to care for her. He caused her to get her numerous scars, lose her fur, and to feel pretty. When he died all he wanted was Scout not her. Honeysong had made sure he was safe, she got him medical attention, she stayed with him! But no it was Scout. She slashed deeper this time. Scout had fallen in love with her. Honeysong was happily in love with Scout. Scout had made her feel whole, beautiful, alive. But Scout didn’t care. No. She didn’t care at all. When Crowbite had ruined everything, ruined every aspect of Shadowclan. She had started to expect his kits and when she needed help, comfort, support. Scout turned away. She slashed again deeper and deeper. It was a rhythm now constant clawing with no stop in mind. She raised the kits. She raised them trying to put on a happy face, trying to seem like all was fine. Then there father toke over the clan. She made sure her kits were safe letting her self be captured along with her friend. Bouncestream. She started to sob. She hadn’t been ready to love again. She hadn’t. She hadn’t. She hadn’t. Blood seeped out of her scars. He had a mate! He had a mate! She was stupid. Leopardroar had attacked her, left her for dead then pinned it on a rouge just because she had a crush on her mate. She was never gonna do anything about it! And now she +
Was forced to never see him. She cried harder and slashed deeper wishing that she would die already. She just wanted to die. No one would care. She just wanted the pain to end. For her to end. - x - x - - x - x - - x - x - - x - x - - x - x - - x - x - - x - x - Just a heads up, this is all how she sees everything, not how things are. So please don’t go correcting me in the comments saying ‘bUt FuRsTaR oNlY sAiD a MoOn’ I’ll just ask you to read this. She’s turning into me more and more....
