Red is now available in real life! Buy him at the Box Island store located 15 trillion light years away from where you are now! Only for $7,000,000,000! Buy him before it probably gets sucked into a black hole! Also, if you buy 1,653 'Red's, you'll get a free Insta-Cleaner with your next purchase! So, yeah! Buy now!
(Disclaimer: Wear a hat! Don't forget to wear a hat!) ((Box Island is not responsible for consumption of Red by idiotic 3 year olds. Don't.. don't pour milk on it.)) (((This is fake. Obviously.))) ((((Jeez Malcolm, trim yo' nails! Also, make sure to close your bedroom door all the way. Don't want Beatrix goin' under the bed..... again.... ))))
