Hai everyone! I was feeling a bit anxious today, then one of my friends inspired me to write down what exactly it felt like to have an attack. Now, this isn't very specific, as all my attacks differ from one another based on factor like the trigger, environment, or anxiety vs panic attack, they all have the same base feeling, which is what I sort of describe how it feel to be in my head during an attack. If anyone ever wants to talk about something like this, I’m totally open to it. <3 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ At first, you don’t really know what’s happening, but you do. Everything makes sense and everything is as it should be. You’re just losing it. Nothing is wrong. You start breathing faster. Time slows. Everything is numb and disconnected. You aren’t sure what is happening. You feel dizzy and light-headed. The world begins to blur heavily. Your chest is tight, which only makes things increasingly worse. There are people trying to talk to you, but you can’t understand their words. They only make you more confused. Someone tries to touch you. You want to tell them not to, but you have frozen. Your world won’t move. Everything keeps going on, but it makes you feel sick. You feel things continue to buzz around you, but you cannot move. Speech is hard. Everything is hard. Nothing makes sense. You feel like this is the end. Nothing could get better. Your thoughts are slow and sticky. You still can’t make sense of things, but you slowly thaw. You muscles slowly relax and you try taking deep breaths to ease your lungs. It will be a bit before the distortion completely goes away, but soon you will be back to your old self. The people that are still there reach out to stoke your arm of hair, but you still don’t want to be touched. You jerk away awkwardly as though your brain can’t properly tell you body what to do. You try to pull your eyes away from the ground, but you can’t. You open your mouth to apologize and explain, but the words sound misplaced and like they aren’t your own. Everything is very loud and overwhelming at first, but it gets better with time.
