The sound of my teammates woke me from my slumber. I groggily sit up in my bed, my eyes adjusting to the darkness of my room. I check the time - 1 am. Why am I surprised? This is normal here in the gang. I push myself off the bed, my feet perfectly sliding into my brown bunny slippers. I stretch my body and walk over to my closet. I have about 7 hours till I'm on duty. I slide on a dusty green t-shirt. “I wonder what crazy things these idiots have planned.” I mutter under my breath as I switch on the lights. Come to think of it, I actually like these guys. Just not Joe. That stupid gardener can burn in hell for all I care. I turn the knob on my door and slide it open. My tail drags behind me as I walk to the bathroom. Before I could even touch the door, Brown came running up to me. I let out an either frustrated or tired sigh, I really couldn't tell which one. “What.” I flatly say, staring at him. I was seeing double, it was always hard to wake up and here I am being bothered. “Hey, Cosmo!” He grinned. He was the youngest here - Jeff and Joe’s adopted kid. He was 16 now. Well, 457. He’s an immortal who’s life resets at 21- I’m too tired to explain this to you right now. “What do you want?” I ask, crossing my arms and glaring at him - His oblivious ass seemed to not notice. Classic Brown. “How was your sleep? Do you have your uhh- duty today?” He keeps questioning me like he actually likes me, strange. “My sleep was okay. And yes, I have duty today-” Brown cut me off with a question I didn't expect. “Do you actually like your purpose?” ….My…what? Oh yeah, the fact I was born a babysitter to everyone in this universe? The fact I'm a personal slave for Void, God himself? No, I don’t like it, Brown. You non-guardians are so damn lucky you don’t have your whole life planned out of you. I would have said that, but I was too tired to get anything like that out at the moment; so I just responded with a simple ‘Sure.’ Before he can ask anything more (which would’ve given me a headache), I walk past him, pushing him slightly as I open the bathroom door and close it behind me. I felt a little bad. Brown is the only one here who genuinely cares about me…but he’s an annoying child who gives a crap. I stare at myself in the mirror, leaning over the sink a bit and holding the sides of the counter. I hate this. I hate all of this. But I must continue - not like I have a choice in the matter. I turn on the tap and wash my toothbrush. As I do so, I exhale on my hand and check my breath. I wince. I can smell last night's microwave mac ‘n cheese but it smells as if Leo slobbered all over it and took a big crap on it. Come to think of it, Leo scares me - Dogs scare me. They’re too nice and trusting, it's uncanny. As I do my normal activity of brushing my teeth and regretting my life choices, I hear a knock on the door which snaps me out of my thoughts. God, can’t I be alone for one second?! I reverse slam the door, or slam open? I don’t know the word but I opened the door in a really angry manner. Outside staring at me, is my mortal enemy (aka my enemy that is mortal), Joe. What did he want now? “Cosmo, could you uh- spawn in a shovel for me?” He sheepishly asked. “Why? Since you want to dig my reputation into the ground?” I reply in a snarky tone. “No, since I broke mine and I want to grow some potatoes.” “Oh, yeah, fair point.” I pull out a brand new shovel out of thin air and hand it to him. “Thanks dude!” He said in an unusually cheerful manner as he ran off. I scoff and return to brushing. After making myself look presentable, I check the time - 1:07. Only 7 minutes, eh? Good enough for me. I brush some dust off my horns and clip on my sadly sunshine yellow cape. I give myself one final look in the mirror, and walk to the living room - The belly of the beast. The first one I see is Jeff. I…don’t really have an opinion about Jeff. He’s…just here. He’s like a supervisor to the 2 raging furies of chaos. I do see him on the piano sometimes, he’s pretty good but I'm sure he knows. I sit down on the couch and spawn in some coffee for myself. I stare at the black screen on the switched off TV. This is going to be a long wait. Sure I hate my job and everyone included in it, Especially Void, but it gives me something to do. I enjoy staying productive and- “Cosmo!!” Brown ran to my side, hyper as per usual. I just ignored him. I never know what he’s talking about. Something about a dude in the forest? Why do we even live near a forest? You’d think with all the money I spawn for these greedy people that they’d get a better house in a better place, maybe like- I don’t know, somewhere with a nice beach? But no, we have to live in this crappy cottage-like thing that could break down at any second. Mental note - Yell at Jeff about that. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Brown staring at me expectantly. What did he want from me? “Cosmo, did you get all that? :D” He asked with a grin
Continuation: I would just plain out say ‘No, I never wanted to listen to your rambling in the first place, get the #### out of my sight’, but, I didn't wan’t to hurt this..thing’s feelings. “.....Sure.” I force on a smile. He seems to accept it and walks away to the kitchen cause his fat-### is probably hungry again. It fascinates me how he eats all the contents in the fridge in one bite, yet is as skinny as a ####### stick. Whatever, It’s probably whatever sick logic TCOJ applied to this world. I hear grunting in the backyard. I get up and walk over to the window. I check outside and see Joe digging up a big hole with a body-bag beside him. Damn. I didn’t know Joe was also a murderer. He didn’t seem to notice me staring as he dumped the body bag into the giant hole and covered it up. I hesitantly glance at Jeff - he would not accept this. I decided to just keep my mouth shut and sit down again. Brown came back up to me and sat down on the couch beside me. He was holding some snacks. “Wanna watch something since you’re here?” Brown weird's me out…he cares about everyone too much…especially me. Does he think I'm not okay? He’s also Void’s slave so I can’t say that he hasn’t had it worse than me. That poor bipolar child. I let out a quiet yawn. “Yeah sure..you choose..” Brown grabs the remote and struggles to turn the tv on despite learning how to work normal human stuff ever since he was out of the lab. I snatch it out of his hand and turn the tv on. “What do you want to watch?” I asked, a bit surprised by how soft and kind my voice got. What’s happening to me? Has that hat stupid void-spawns plague of- of being too trusting infected me? Great. I clear my throat and ask the same thing but in my normal tone of voice. Of course, he wants to watch Bluey. Why am I even surprised? I turn on the episode of where he left off. He immediately gets engrossed by the show. I roll my eyes. Joe walks in through the backdoor, mud on his face. He took his gloves and boots off. “I’m back!” Jeff looked over and gave a smile. “Sup How was the planting or whatever?” “It was great-” Their conversation slowly filters out in my head as I stare at a wall. I miss my friends..but i’ll see them soon today. Maybe they can go out with me to get some food or something.
