I realized to stand a chance against the real Michael Jackson, I had to get an ally. So I started calling my old friends for help. Arthur Morgan was too tired from that silly little dance he did. DoomGuy was too angry. And Mr. Rogers was in debt so I thought it would be a good idea to not bother him. It dawned on me that the only friend I could pick to help me would be my cousin's best friend Robert E.O. Speedwagon. My reasoning was that Speedwagon has a... a Grass Wacker in his shed. A... a Grass Wacker is one of the most effective weapons of all time. I borrowed this from him without him knowing late at night while he was asleep. He will never see it again. On the way out of the Speedwagon residence, I came across the little troll that lives under the bridge. He said he wanted his money back. I said no and started to walk away. But he tornado kicked me in the spine. I could tell that the little troll who lived under the bridge was much stronger than he was the last time we met. I proceeded to grab him by his Despicable Me Gru nose and throw him 450.324245323453534524435352343452451445989798798665927593259 feet. I made a sheath for my new weapon and I marched onward to find another ally. Turns out Elon Musk fell on some hard times after the guy from Komic Krew inc. bought all of his companies. Elon was willing to do any task for $4 per hour. This seemed like a good deal to me so I called him and asked for help. I told him how dangerous the mission would be and how he would likely be scarred both psychically and mentally. He said as long as he had that $4 per hour it didn't matter what he had to do. To be continued...
I'm really cranking these out. Inspired by Cheeseman's Rambing series. You should check that out.
